What is it about your arms that make me feel so safe, and your kisses send electricity through my core... The intensity of you, is too much to bare, I have to make a decision soon. Will I stay and try something new... or will I run back to my safety net. There I know my expectations - and only I have control of my heart.... but is it time to let those things go?

I don't have to give you my heart, I gave you a piece - I am curious what you will do with it? So far... I have managed to freak out in giving it to you, yet beyond anything you moved past it. I am curious... I want to test you, but I will not. If I am going to try - I only want to show you my best, it doesn't make sense... I know. All my friends tell me that I am headed for this awful disaster - so in this moment, silence is my friend - and my tormentor.

You must decide too, you are scared as well. I see it, I do. I see it although you do not say - your actions speak so loud, and your responses are clear. We are both terrified, and I have no idea where to go from here. Will you stay, or will you go- I want to decide this too... It drives me crazy this undecided portion of my life. I feel like I have to hide, while we both decide.

We don't make sense the two of us... we just don't. I look at the people we are, where we come from, our goals - and we just don't make any sense. You want something I could only dream about, an my dreams take me away from where I am now. I cannot stay and compromise more of my life... but how stupid am I to run away from the possibility of internal happiness? While we do not make sense, I am astounded by the softness of your heart... the compassion. I AM SO CONFUSED!

I must decide, because I must either move on, or give up my desire to control... I cannot hold my heart hostage in fear of being hurt. When you open up to the good... sometimes you discover the bad. I am terrified of what to do. If I choose you... then what?